When we think of Easter most of us either envision a religious experience or something sweet. But why settle for one or the other when there are plenty of toys that’ll give you both?
Last week we talked about rabbits and this week we’re going to round out that spring theme and talk about eggs. Egg-shaped vibrators – called “bullets” when they’re more elongated than elliptical – are clitoral stimulators, or at least that’s how most people use them, says Rob, a sales associate at Fairvilla Megastore who knows more about the store’s eggs than chickens do about theirs. Because of their small size, Rob says, eggs and bullets are discreet and easy to use in solo or partner sex. Their bestseller is the Turbo 8 Accelerator (pictured, left). “That egg is ready to hatch and go to the moon,” Rob jokes and no wonder – it packs FOUR AA batteries, so it packs a lot of punch.
Another popular one is the 7 Wonder Bullet (pictured, left), no bigger than the tip of your pinky but with enough buzz to light up the neighborhood (though they’d never hear it). Fairvilla’s Ashley advises me “Put it against the tip of your nose,” because the nerve endings are similar to the ones “down there.” Indeed, on its highest setting I jumped back like the thing was on fire – the pulsating setting provided more more of desirable tickle. Finally no one can help but love the Love Bug Bullet, a soft egg vibrator by Doc Johnson with a butterfly embossed on the egg. The Love Bug comes in the perfect spring colors of pink and peach– the best, buzziest bouquet you could pick.
If you come into Fairvilla to check out the bullets and eggs – and I stopped counting when I got to 50 different styles – take some wonderfully practical advice from Rob and make sure you take note of the type of batteries your chosen toy takes. Some take watch or strange-sized batteries that most of us don’t have just laying around the house. “If it runs down you can’t just take the batteries out of your remote,” he said, pointing to the flower-shaped Vibin’ Miss Daisy (no, I’m not kidding) which is a good product, but runs on watch batteries, so you’d have to make sure to stock up.
“Oh, my God,” I thought, “How does he know I take the batteries out of the remote like that?” And I do. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve become irritated with a vibe that’s petering out and done exactly the transfer Rob described, just as I transfer good light bulbs from one lamp to another because I haven’t the foresight to stock up on anything. Turns out it’s not just me. Don’t you love when you find that out?
Anyway, don’t let the excitement of the toy store let your forget your power source. A vibrator with no batteries is literally a buzz kill.
And do stop in or go to www.fairvilla.com and check out the eggs and rabbits for Easter. Spring is in the air – these toys will put it in your step.